I have been home alone all night, just thinking about everything thats been bothering me. My boyfriend, went to his friends house right after being home from work for not even an hour & i was sad because i wasn't invited, never really am unless i ask to go. it hurts my feelings because i want to feel included, i mean i don't really hang out with anyone or have many friends to go do things with. when he came home he didn't even say hey or give me a kiss..and it took him almost 30 min before i had to go in there and ask if he was going to say hey to me. he always says "i was just getting ready too", but im not stupid :(. i just feel unappreciated and like things just wont go my way. even if i try so hard for us to not fight or to make a effort to brighten his day. I'm dreading valentines day because i got him this really amazing gift & i am honestly scared he's not going to get me anything, which might hurt my feelings. I don't ask much from him, just simple sweet things but i don't even get that :( i guess i feel like i'm not good enough or that he doesn't want to be around me. He says he loves me so that has to mean something, & i believe him when he says it. He's not a horrible boyfriend & i love him with everything i have but i just feel like ever since we started living together our relationship is this crazy roller coaster & it's a little hard for me to handle, it stressses me out! Maybe i am just over thinking like normal, but i hope things get better in the morning, we will seee.
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
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